~EveninG~

Today, 29 October 2009….i woke up early in the morning just to find out I nearly miss a replacement class…but things go well, I manage to attend to the class, meeting with my co-supervisor for my FYP and then pay a visit to tutorial lecturer to collect assignment and tutorials…go to weekly Jumaat pray and then end of my mid day in front of my laptop….

Evening, in the evening, where everything become so weird….i soon realize I was standing at the edge of Kuala Perlis jetty, waving pointlessly towards my friend departure…soon came to notice, since 3 o clock today I already seen departure a lot of my friends….well, I admit I don't appreciate them much, but they are pieces in my life, and my life wouldn't be complete without them….

Well, it's never been easy to control one's emotion…. I slowly ride my friend bike after sending the third guy for today, and watching them happily to get home soon…. I don't know, nothing in particular come up in my mind, and I feel like riding without anyone else on the road….gladly, there's not much vehicle so that I don't involve in anything bad….but I still cannot figure out the weird feeling I get since the last guy depart…

At the exact 6.15 p.m., after 15 minutes of riding a slow motion bike (it's not the bike is slow, but I accelerate it slowly), I finally reach my campus…but I don't know, usually I managed to get over the guard, but I don't know what happen with me, I just stopped right in front of them and doing everything they asked me to…

Then I realized, I was holding a paper with writing in black and my signature on it….yes, it is a ticket, issued by the campus guard to me, charging me with a stupid mistake….he just issued me RM 50 for not displaying student sticker on the bike….well, this is strange….so far I used my friend bike, the sticker are always there…but it strange this evening the sticker not there anymore, and I am unfortunate to run into the guards without the sticker on…

I try to explain, and I guess my explanation is reasonable…the sticker was there, and there's no mistaking it…but how should I know if it had been picked by another vehicle owner who are too hard to pay RM 5 for a sticker….and I don't know what happen to myself, usually I will argue until I got no point, but this evening I easily obeyed the guards….

While holding the ticket, I watched myself in the mirror….what could be wrong I've done today, because I feel really empty inside out…. I see my friend departure, I go to class, I get summoned, but no feeling inside of me….there is no joy, no happiness, no sadness, no angry and madness, nothing….i just feel nothing….

At 9.50 p.m., I send another guy to depart…well, he treat me with KFC, which I never expect from him, and got back to campus….still, there is no mood come to me….i got visit from my friends which have been long I seen him, and still, I don't feel anything….we talked, we laughed, we eat, we walked, but I still feel empty….

The whole night, I spend on playing DotA, a game that I always play during my free time…and this time, I no play alone, but with few leftover friend of mine…even we lose and win consecutively, I don't know why, but I did not enjoy tonight games.…

Well, up until now, as I am typing my next words of this post, I still haven't feel anything, even it already 4.57 a.m. (based on my clock)….well I guess I stop it right here, as my eyes are blinking weakly and still, I got no intention and feel to sleep….but I guess this where I bid goodbye, so see ya next time…today evening has been a weirdest evening of my life…. =)