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Monday, May 10, 2010

~a WalK tO RemembeR~

today,
i looked back in my diary....
full of scratches for the past few months...
i read one by one pages,
one after another.....

1st December 2010...
the very start of the very end...
igniter for a new path,
and as ending for the previous live....
the life as a student,
lies behind me...
where the path of uncertainty
still peak ahead of me....

today,
as i recalled the memories,
i begin to laughed all alone....
i cried all alone.....
and i smile all alone.....
thinking of the memories,
for the path that i had choose,
and every decision that i made,
and every steps that i take....

as today,
in the very last moment....
i would like to summarize my life here....
as it started
as well as it ended....
where there memories lie,
there will be never a good bye.....

today,
when i looked at my diary
i began to understand....
there's a lot of achievement
can be done...
not by only ourselves,
but with the help of others...
i learned how to be a man,
i has been shown how to
be pamper as a woman....
lot of things we've going through
even though there are bitter and sour a bit...
but hey....
that's life...wasn't it??

today,
at the very end of this note,
i would like to show my gratitude,
to show my appreciation,
and my respect
to those who has been in my life
and those who had their own chapter in my life
thank you,
for everything
that i take from you,
and for everything
that i gave to you,
and everything that we share....
for the past few months,
where i learned a lot,
and lot more you thought me...
thank you.....

Thursday, May 6, 2010

~I HatE MyselF~



yup....
dats rite...

i hate myself....
i hate myself....
why??
only Allah know why..
..

i try my best....
and i hate it....

why should i try my best for.....
just for a person just for a lady....
just to prove what i am capable of....
i hate myself....

i hate myself....
i play pretend that i'm ok...
i'm ok..

if u ask me i'm always ok...
there's no problem within me....
i'm ok....

as ok as the mountain....
steady through everything...

but then...
that's what you see from the outside...
it's only the mask that i wear
to fool you

to fool everyone
to fool everybody
to see that i'm ok...

but deep inside

i'm totally broken....


i hate myself....
why must i cry to know the truth??

why am i must suffer
just to sustain my faith in you??

i hate myself....

because of everything i've done...
and for that reason,
i hate myself....
i know you already hate me,
and that make me even
want to
hate myself more
and more

and again

I HATE MYSELF VERY MUCH...

Monday, May 3, 2010

i'm sori.....
i'm not into this.....
da lame x bkk blog...
byk sgt bnda happen smpai xde feel da nk mengarang....
sori la kwn2...
yg mne bce,
yg mne bkk blog ni....
yg mne just tgk.....
sori sbb dis blog is empty
n not updated....
byk sgt bnda nk crite,
n byk sgt bnda nk tulis...
but not this time...
i'm sory...
later....
bye....